On Le Talent Show
I was in it! Whoo-hoo! So it must have been good right? Well here is a basic run-through of what happened for all those who didn't get to see it:
First was us, of course, although we sang this song that was about this person who was dying. Nobody else seems to think so, of course, but I have a particular knack for figuring out these things. So anyway, for the longest time, I couldn't figure out whether I should sing or play trombone, because that seemed like a really big deal to me when we were in the rehearsing stages. Let me just tell you, I sing like crap. But I can be loud when I want to: really loud. And when we were rehearsing, that's what we really needed, a loud person. Because we didn't have any written out music, just the song, which our amazing math teacher extracted some obscure notes and chords from just by listening to it, don't ask me how he did it. He just did. So anyway, waaaaay back in 6th grade (wow, such a long time ago!) I played trombone in the talent show, too, so I wasn't sure if I wanted to do it again since I didn't want to make that seem as if it was my only talent. (Which it pretty much is) So I thought I'd sing for a change, since I'm not in chorus and General Music stopped in 7th grade. So I sing a lot at home, but not in school. And really, this is the last year I'm going to be in this school, I might as well make the most of it, and I was having a lot more fun singing because I can totally rock out when I let myself. And none of the other [eight] singers were getting that into it at all. That's what you really need to set the attitude, a bunch of kids on stage rocking out. So in the end, I compromised and did both. Played trombone during the choruses and sang the verses because none of the other horns played during the verses anyway. And we had our own personal mike sitting on our side of the stage, conveniently enough. At the end of the second show, I threw my sunglasses (the cool reflective ones!) out into the audience and I instantly regretted it because I really liked those and wanted them back. I though I knew exactly where I threw them, in the empty seats where we used to be sitting, but when we sat back down, I couldn't find them and got really down. Luckily Elizabeth had found them and have them back at dismissal and I shall be eternally grateful to her forevermore. Wasn't that a nice story?
The other acts were OK, but the second time around, it was kind of boring. Plus, I was worried about my shades and so couldn't really get into it. Mostly, I was falling asleep because getting up on stage in front of loads of people can be very stressful and exhausting. Only for me, it wasn't very stressful so I made up for it by being extra-exhausted. As in double the exhaustion. And the one with the "Chinese instrument" particularly made me want to snooze because it just went on and oooon. But the Bat thing w/ Lenahan and co. woke me up. Majorly. But I have to say, my favorite act was the comedians. They were amazing. And I liked the kids sitting on the piano, too!
On Antibodies and Antigens
Why would anybody call them that? "Anti" means what, exactly? Here is the exact Merriam-Webster dictionary definition:
- Main Entry:
- anti-
- Pronunciation:
- \ˌan-ˌtī, ˌan-tē also ˌan-ti before consonsants\
- Variant(s):
- or ant- or anth-
- Function:
- prefix
- Etymology:
- anti- from Middle English, from Anglo-French & Latin; Anglo-French, from Latin, against, from Greek, from anti; ant- from Middle English, from Latin, against, from Greek, from anti; anth- from Latin, against, from Greek, from anti — more at ante-
1 a: of the same kind but situated opposite, exerting energy in the opposite direction, or pursuing an opposite policy <anticlinal> b: one that is opposite in kind to <anticlimax>
2 a: opposing or hostile to in opinion, sympathy, or practice <anti-Semite> b: opposing in effect or activity <antacid>
3: serving to prevent, cure, or alleviate <antianxiety>
4: combating or defending against <antiaircraft> <antimissile>
So it pretty much means against, right? Now, you would THINK that an antibody would attack the body, and antiGENs would attack the pathoGENs! But noooo. It's the other way around. So this just goes to show how backwards some of these science people can be! I mean, ok, think of a shot. HOW many people actually enjoy having a shot? No-one! So here's the REAL reason we have vaccinations, and I know it may sound sort of ridiculous, but everyone thought the notion that the earth was round was ridiculous, too. So if you think Christopher Columbus was right, just listen to me. The REAL reason we have shots is because doctors are trying to take over the world. Why do you think they make so much money and have to go to school for years and years and years before they become a doctor? It's because the people at the medical schools brainwash them! Then, when they come out of medical school, they make tons of money to go towards the cause: taking over the world. But none of that is the secret. Their secret is vaccinations. See, they make you THINK they are improving your health and all that, yada, yada, but the shots are really used to make you think doctors are these nice, when they are really trying to overtake the world. And there's not just one culprit. They know that by having a team of them, they will be much more effective as a united front. So all those people who say they want to become a doctor when they grow up have no idea what they're in for. And it's really only kids who truly see the sinister intent behind shots. Like, all the people who don't want to be doctors say it's because they don't like seeing blood. And it's a valid argument. What kind of person would really want to go to work every day and see blood? Why would you voluntary put a mask on, go into this room, and pick people apart? And with all kinds of people watching you, no less. They used to have theaters especially for surgery, wisely dubbed "surgical theaters". Then again, the Romans used to put their prisoners of war in a big ring and watch lions eat them. But we're not that bloodthirsty anymore. Oh, no. Doctors have a much better reason now for doing such things, because they know they can reap some personal benefit, and not just monetarily. Those shots don't keep you from getting sick they MAKE SURE you get sick! Then you will keep coming back to them and will have to pay them more money!! This is what capitalism has led people to do. You can even tell that this scheme is taught at medical schools, because many doctors leave all their money, not to their family, but to their medical school when they die. Wonder why? They care more about "advancing the cause" than their own blood relations. And they partly are accountable for this, but it was a lot to do with the people who brainwash them in the first place. All this is obvious evidence that doctors are not to be trusted anymore. The whole reason they make so much money is because they themselves caused it to happen by making YOU sick! Some day the world will be dominated by doctors who have control only because of their power to cause disease, and they're the only ones who have the cures so that you don't die. As you can see, this would be the prime weapon to take over the world. Some of the lower-key parts of the media have been trying to tell people what's happening, too. If you've ever watched Mission Impossible, you'll know that the deadly weapon that was the thing Ethan Hunt and everybody on his side was trying to save the world from was a disease! There have been many more films and books like this but the makers of Mission Impossible have been the most successful. But the doctors are cunning, and we have to watch out. The reason all those other movies and books are not global warnings to the people of the world is because the doctors have been trying desperately to keep their secret weapon a secret. One can sense a glimpse of this scheme by reading a less-famous book, The Pearl, by Steinbeck. There is only a very abbreviated reference to this medical scandal, but it happens when the baby Coyotito becomes poisoned by a scorpion. The doctor, who is white, gives the baby this "white powder" and the baby becomes even more sick. Kino, the baby's father, suspects this, but cannot do anything about it because he does not know as much as the doctor and cannot act against him because there is always the risk that what the doctor is saying is true, and he would never risk his son's life. This shows that Steinbeck also knew about the scandal going on in the medical world, but could only make this very vague reference in his book in fear that the doctors would be out to get him if he let slip the truth. So be warned, my readers, and you can never trust a doctor. And by no means am I saying this because I just don't like shots. That is not it at all. This is not at all because I scream and cry and whimper whenever I have to get a shot and have made up this whole ruse in the many times I have been sitting, lonely and desperate in the waiting room of the pediatrician's office, expecting the shot that will come very shortly. Because I am better than that, and if anybody tells you otherwise, they are wrong. Really.
On Parodies
I really like parodies. If anybody asked me what type of music I liked, I would totally say parodies if that was actually an official genre. Which I'm not sure it is, but I'm not a person who would know these things. But anyway, I like them so much, I just made one. And I think it's pretty good, if I do say so myself. Maybe I shall start a band that only plays parodies. I would toootally be the songwriter. We could be a parody band. You know, just like a rock band plays rock songs, my parody band would play parodies. So anyway, here's my parody of "Nowhere Man" by the Beatles (it's about golfing):
He's a real golfer man
Sitting in his golfing land
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Drove his golf cart right through the door
Knows not what he's aiming for
Isn't he a bit too short for playing golf?
Golfer man, please listen
All your swings keep missin'
Golfer man, the golf course is at your command
Can't even make a hole-in-three
Sitting at his golfing tee
Golfer man, please don't hit me again.
Golfer man, don't worry
Take your time, Don't hurry
Stay right there
You know you should stick to solitaire
Drove his golf cart right through the door
Knows not what he's aiming for
Isn't he a bit too short for playing golf?
Golfer man, please listen
All your swings keep missin'
Golfer man, the golf course is at your command
He's a real golfer man
sitting in his golfing land
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Now here's the lyrics for the real song so you can compare:
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere Man can you see me at all?
Nowhere Man, don't worry
Take your time, don't hurry
Leave it all till somebody else lends you a hand
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
He's a real Nowhere Man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
One thing I don't like about lyrics that are written down is even if you know the tune and the words, you still don't know how to sing it. The only way to REALLY let you know how my parody goes, I would have to sing it for you. Which I will when I get back from vacation by the way, if you want me to. Because music speaks louder than words. Or is it actions? Actions speak louder than words? That makes no sense. Whatever.
2 a: opposing or hostile to in opinion, sympathy, or practice <anti-Semite> b: opposing in effect or activity <antacid>
3: serving to prevent, cure, or alleviate <antianxiety>
4: combating or defending against <antiaircraft> <antimissile>
So it pretty much means against, right? Now, you would THINK that an antibody would attack the body, and antiGENs would attack the pathoGENs! But noooo. It's the other way around. So this just goes to show how backwards some of these science people can be! I mean, ok, think of a shot. HOW many people actually enjoy having a shot? No-one! So here's the REAL reason we have vaccinations, and I know it may sound sort of ridiculous, but everyone thought the notion that the earth was round was ridiculous, too. So if you think Christopher Columbus was right, just listen to me. The REAL reason we have shots is because doctors are trying to take over the world. Why do you think they make so much money and have to go to school for years and years and years before they become a doctor? It's because the people at the medical schools brainwash them! Then, when they come out of medical school, they make tons of money to go towards the cause: taking over the world. But none of that is the secret. Their secret is vaccinations. See, they make you THINK they are improving your health and all that, yada, yada, but the shots are really used to make you think doctors are these nice, when they are really trying to overtake the world. And there's not just one culprit. They know that by having a team of them, they will be much more effective as a united front. So all those people who say they want to become a doctor when they grow up have no idea what they're in for. And it's really only kids who truly see the sinister intent behind shots. Like, all the people who don't want to be doctors say it's because they don't like seeing blood. And it's a valid argument. What kind of person would really want to go to work every day and see blood? Why would you voluntary put a mask on, go into this room, and pick people apart? And with all kinds of people watching you, no less. They used to have theaters especially for surgery, wisely dubbed "surgical theaters". Then again, the Romans used to put their prisoners of war in a big ring and watch lions eat them. But we're not that bloodthirsty anymore. Oh, no. Doctors have a much better reason now for doing such things, because they know they can reap some personal benefit, and not just monetarily. Those shots don't keep you from getting sick they MAKE SURE you get sick! Then you will keep coming back to them and will have to pay them more money!! This is what capitalism has led people to do. You can even tell that this scheme is taught at medical schools, because many doctors leave all their money, not to their family, but to their medical school when they die. Wonder why? They care more about "advancing the cause" than their own blood relations. And they partly are accountable for this, but it was a lot to do with the people who brainwash them in the first place. All this is obvious evidence that doctors are not to be trusted anymore. The whole reason they make so much money is because they themselves caused it to happen by making YOU sick! Some day the world will be dominated by doctors who have control only because of their power to cause disease, and they're the only ones who have the cures so that you don't die. As you can see, this would be the prime weapon to take over the world. Some of the lower-key parts of the media have been trying to tell people what's happening, too. If you've ever watched Mission Impossible, you'll know that the deadly weapon that was the thing Ethan Hunt and everybody on his side was trying to save the world from was a disease! There have been many more films and books like this but the makers of Mission Impossible have been the most successful. But the doctors are cunning, and we have to watch out. The reason all those other movies and books are not global warnings to the people of the world is because the doctors have been trying desperately to keep their secret weapon a secret. One can sense a glimpse of this scheme by reading a less-famous book, The Pearl, by Steinbeck. There is only a very abbreviated reference to this medical scandal, but it happens when the baby Coyotito becomes poisoned by a scorpion. The doctor, who is white, gives the baby this "white powder" and the baby becomes even more sick. Kino, the baby's father, suspects this, but cannot do anything about it because he does not know as much as the doctor and cannot act against him because there is always the risk that what the doctor is saying is true, and he would never risk his son's life. This shows that Steinbeck also knew about the scandal going on in the medical world, but could only make this very vague reference in his book in fear that the doctors would be out to get him if he let slip the truth. So be warned, my readers, and you can never trust a doctor. And by no means am I saying this because I just don't like shots. That is not it at all. This is not at all because I scream and cry and whimper whenever I have to get a shot and have made up this whole ruse in the many times I have been sitting, lonely and desperate in the waiting room of the pediatrician's office, expecting the shot that will come very shortly. Because I am better than that, and if anybody tells you otherwise, they are wrong. Really.
On Parodies
I really like parodies. If anybody asked me what type of music I liked, I would totally say parodies if that was actually an official genre. Which I'm not sure it is, but I'm not a person who would know these things. But anyway, I like them so much, I just made one. And I think it's pretty good, if I do say so myself. Maybe I shall start a band that only plays parodies. I would toootally be the songwriter. We could be a parody band. You know, just like a rock band plays rock songs, my parody band would play parodies. So anyway, here's my parody of "Nowhere Man" by the Beatles (it's about golfing):
He's a real golfer man
Sitting in his golfing land
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Drove his golf cart right through the door
Knows not what he's aiming for
Isn't he a bit too short for playing golf?
Golfer man, please listen
All your swings keep missin'
Golfer man, the golf course is at your command
Can't even make a hole-in-three
Sitting at his golfing tee
Golfer man, please don't hit me again.
Golfer man, don't worry
Take your time, Don't hurry
Stay right there
You know you should stick to solitaire
Drove his golf cart right through the door
Knows not what he's aiming for
Isn't he a bit too short for playing golf?
Golfer man, please listen
All your swings keep missin'
Golfer man, the golf course is at your command
He's a real golfer man
sitting in his golfing land
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Making all his golfing plans
for his caddy
Now here's the lyrics for the real song so you can compare:
He's a real nowhere man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
He's as blind as he can be
Just sees what he wants to see
Nowhere Man can you see me at all?
Nowhere Man, don't worry
Take your time, don't hurry
Leave it all till somebody else lends you a hand
Doesn't have a point of view
Knows not where he's going to
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
Nowhere Man, please listen
You don't know what you're missing
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
He's a real Nowhere Man
Sitting in his nowhere land
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody
One thing I don't like about lyrics that are written down is even if you know the tune and the words, you still don't know how to sing it. The only way to REALLY let you know how my parody goes, I would have to sing it for you. Which I will when I get back from vacation by the way, if you want me to. Because music speaks louder than words. Or is it actions? Actions speak louder than words? That makes no sense. Whatever.
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